Confession Time

OK... I've dickered around long enough, and it's time to come clean. This revelation is anticlimactic to probably half my pals in blogland but to some of you, yes, this is news. I'm pregnant.

Knocked up.
Up the duff, for you Anglophiles.

I've been in this condition for quite a few weeks (18 to be exact) but that doesn't keep me from waking up every morning slightly stunned. Learning that I was pregnant was indeed shocking for both Mike and myself, but truth be told we never really knew whether or not having bio kids was a possibility. Our reasons for adopting came equally from a.) a true desire to become adoptive parents and b.) concern for my health due to having high blood pressure since age 13. (Yes, 13!) The truth is, I never really had this huge longing to be pregnant; I only had the REALLY huge longing to have a family. So we chose one of a few options and never really looked back, except to grumble regularly about China's ridiculous waiting list.

Anyway. As it happens, I got pregnant, and have since enjoyed a relationship with a team of excellent docs who are checking my status regularly. The good news is that so far, I'm healthy, the baby is healthy, and we're almost halfway there. The hope is that we'll hang in there as long as possible and avoid pre-eclampsia (my major risk). We just have to take it day by day.

So... where does that leave the adoption? Our plan right now is to request our dossier be put on hold for a while. With the wait time extending further and further, we may not even have to go on hold, but we will still ask the agency about this. After the baby comes (due Jan 25th) we'll talk to the agency about updating our homestudy, and then make a decision on what to do.

We've been really committed to and excited about adopting a little girl from China. We've talked a lot about how we'd feel if circumstances keep us from being able to go through with it. It's complicated and we don't take it lightly, so for now we've decided not to even think about it because we simply don't know what the future holds. I still follow lots of China blogs and stay on top of the news, though. That's really all we can do right now.

So there you have it. Now, for your enjoyment, I've been keeping a secret blog cataloguing my ultrasounds, wacked-out symptoms, and ever widening silhouette, so feel free to read the back issues. I will probably update that one exclusively for the time being, so please join me there. I will keep you posted on that site about what's happening with the adoption.

See you at http://moyerpartyofthree.blogspot.com!